| The
PowerPuff Girls' PowerPuff Girls Special |
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transcribed by Louis Badalament II (lb140900@ohio.edu)
At the point where our story begins, the setting Sun casts autumnal shades of orange and red over the skyscrapers of Townsville, a city that unhappily happens to be
situated...
ANNOUNCER: (Menacing and low) In a world consumed by darkness...
...A world that, among other things, houses an ANNOUNCER. The ANNOUNCER is a man situated in a place out of anyone's view, and narrates in one of the most intimidating tones of voice imaginable. In addition to this current piece, this ANNOUNCER has probably lent his voice to the practically
all of the Horror and Apocalyptic Science-Fiction preview trailers, past and present, ever to be broadcast on a movie
screen.
Grave, portentous violin music, as well as a somber choir chorused together in an inauspicious Latin hymnal, accompany our ANNOUNCER as background music as he continues on with his ominous
message.
ANNOUNCER: ...Where Peace and Harmony are luxuries no one can afford...
A place where fires burn out of control, gigantic monstrosities with jaws wide enough to swallow tanks roar out in predatory hunger, where stampedes of helpless civilians flee for their lives in desperate, screaming panic, ad eggs splatter dramatically on the
pavement...
ANNOUNCER: ...Three young women...
...who are, of course, The POWERPUFF GIRLS, standing in triangular heroic poise with their arms knuckled sternly atop their hips, all glaring forth with grim, resolute expressions on their young
faces.
ANNOUNCER: ...dare to rise up against the forces of tyranny wrecking
havoc on the masses!
It is at this moment that a somewhat more familiar unseen individual decides to speak
up.
NARRATOR: Uh...excuse me!
However, the ANNOUNCER doesn't hear the NARRATOR at first.
ANNOUNCER: Together, they'll offer a glimmer of hope to those...!!!
NARRATOR: (More firmly) Excuse me! Hello?
ANNOUNCER: (Darkly irritated) What is it?!
NARRATOR: This just isn't the way this show works!
At this, absolutely everything, the violinists, the Latin choir, even the enormous green lizard currently breathing fire on the Townsville skyscrapers, freezes as if paused by a remote
control.
ANNOUNCER: (Brusquely) Really?
NARRATOR: Right! Usually, I just start things off with a quaint and charming phrase like,
'The City Of Townsville!'
ANNOUNCER: (Thoughtfully) Hmmm...
At this point, everything has unfrozen, and more footage of the POWERPUFFS' various escapades are being displayed; there's BUBBLES sticking her tongue out at a demonically-altered piņata, the three girls landing before a cheering crowd with proud smiles on their faces, all of it is of a more lighthearted nature, in keeping of that of
NARRATOR.
NARRATOR: And then, 'Those adorable little Powerpuff Girls Swing into
action!'
At this point, the NARRATOR feels he has made his point across.
NARRATOR: C'mon, huh? You give it a try!
The ANNOUNCER clears his throat. As he begins again, the violinists and the choir start back up with the same dark tune they were playing
before the NARRATOR had decided to make his presence known.
ANNOUNCER: (As foreboding as ever) In a world known only as
The City Of Townsville...!!!
It is a second or too before the NARRATOR tells him...
NARRATOR: (nervously) ...okay! That's...good!
And with that said, the ANNOUNCER concludes his skin-chilling report
uninterrupted.
ANNOUNCER: (Vengefully) The Powerpuff Girls' 'Powerpuff Girls
Special'! Tonight at eight and eight-thirty! ONLY on CARTOON
NETWORK!!!!!
NARRATOR: (Small and frightened) ...Please don't hurt me!
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