Tales of the Net Kooks

The almost, but not quite, entirely un-infamous cheat code virus claims another victim.

There have been many outlandish virus hoaxes throughout the years claiming all sorts of catastrophe. The damage claimed by the "warning" is usually inversely proportionate to the harmlessness of the computer operation that triggers it.

These hoaxes are usually perpetrated by people wanting to raise a stir among the less savvy computer (l)users on the Internet. However, I've always suspected that some of these "warnings" originated from the individuals whose IQ scores are two standard deviations from the norm...to the left. For example, some moron misspells a web-site URL and gets redirected to porn site. Next thing you know, they're on the phone with some other idiot telling them their nice computer with the "32X cup-holder" has a virus.

Now, I'm a pretty patient guy when it comes to dealing with people completely devoid of technical know-how. I explain things calmly, clearly, and accurately. Okay, okay, there was that time when I "fixed" this person's computer by turning on the power switch to their monitor. She asked me what caused the problem and I told her there was "a nut loose behind the keyboard." But I digress...

Here is an email from someone whose problem is very similar to the lady I described in the previous paragraph. Take a look:

From:	mfang@footinmouth.net
Date:	Thursday, July 25, 2002 8:32:08 PM
Subject:	Code mess up
To:	moonraiser@moonpuppies.com

The code to unlock trading cards,Levels, And cheats messed up my game. It
scrambled up my gameboy color screen And it did not let me play the new
levels, See the new cards,Use the new cheats. That code is screwed up
badly!!!!! Were did you get it?!? You owe All t P.P.G. and R.R.B fans an
apologie!!!


 This E-mail was typed by: [NAME WITHHELD] A.K.A. The Rowdy Ruff Boy Lover >:(

Oh my God! I must inform everyone at once!!!

WARNING! PPG GAMEBOY GAME CODES HAS VIRUS! FORWARD THIS MESAGETO ALL OF FRIENDS 10X!!! IF GAMEBOY INFECTED, DISASSEMBLE AND SOAK IN TOILET OVERNIGHT! DO NOT LET MONKEY DOO-DOO INTO CONTACT WITH GAMEBOY IN TOILERT! VIRUS BAD CODE MESS UP!!!! CAUSE MARIO DO BAD THING TO PRNCEEES MUSHROM!! I AM APOLOGIE TO ALL FANZ!!! EMAIL ME MOONRAZER@ MOONPUPIEZ..COM FOR MORE INFO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!